Dumb Ass
Tonight, it was Dean Wheeler from the Northern California Holistic Center talking about how salting the streets of Seattle during a recent snowstorm only kills the salmon in Puget Sound when the snow melts. Dean thinks the solution is for people to learn to drive better “on ice and black ice. When your car begins to glide left or right, turn into the glide, then check the rear view mirror for how far away traffic is, count four and then leap from the car, rolling twice and jumping up.” He said that in a hydro-planing situation “see if you have brakes or steering. If not bounce up and down in your seat to see if the center of gravity changes in the car. If that doesn’t work have any passenegers crawl into the back seat to change the weight distrubution. If you have infants or children in the car wait for an approaching snowbank and throw them into it. An infant should be thrown like a football with a tight spiral so it sticks in the snow. If you are alone, lay down flat on the front seat, grab the car door in front with your hands and hook your feet into the car door behind. That way you keep the car from losing it’s doors once it gets airborne. An airborne car always wants to shed its doors and wheels.”
