I'm Dr Arthur Barn. And for the last 38 years I have needlessly trespassed over the private properties of countless cemeteries. I've criminally torn open beirs and caskets purchased by bereaved families for the remains of their loved ones. And I have hideously mutilated those remains by impaling them on stakes, severing the heads and stuffing garlic flowers into the corpses' orifices. I should be locked up in an insane asylum and the key thrown in the ocean over the Mariana Trench.
However, through a deal I worked with the courts, I have been granted the opportunity to repair a tiny bit of the damage I've done. That is why Saturday on the Phil Hendrie Show I will present "Dr Arthur Barn: Vampires Don't Exist," an hour long expose of perhaps the greatest hoax ever perpetrated. There are no "undead." They don't suck your blood. They don't have Superman strength.....I mean there's a lot of bullshit I'll have to deal with. And I will. Saturday. You'll need your BSP
Reverend Dave Castorini again tries to rationalize the obvious fact that he's gay by saying sex in the name of a "higher purpose" is just fine. Curt Queedy and Guy Barton have been voted out of the West Virginia state legislature, but that doesn't stop them from bullcrapping their way onto the show.
For today's podcast, we're featuring an encore broadcast of the show from October 17th, 2014.
The show started off with the good news from Margaret Grey's household that there was no bloody, Ebola diarrhea there at all this morning, much to the general disgust of the crew to which Margaret reacted, typically, with shock and indignation. She recovered enough to butcher up the song "Total Eclipse of the Heart" or as she called it "Turn Around Bright Eyes." Phil also sang.
Phil reviewed walk-off home runs that have won league championships, including last night's by San Francisco's Trevor Ishakawa.
August Selsen concluded with a brand new half hour of advice on "How to do sex good."