Hour 1:
R.C. Collins is on telling women to doll up for the troops because they are used to looking at FHM overseas.
Hour 2:
Mavis Leonard is an old woman who was "phone-scammed" by some guys who said she could buy "a time share on an island owned by Johnny Depp." Mavis is now reduced to "eating cat food" and she proceeds to open about 900 cans of Sheba to "protest Johnny Depp."
Hour 3:
Brad Rifkin shines an image of Jesus on the side of his building, and has a girl with a rosary collect money.
