Hour One:
Mr Loyd Bonafide of Alhambra, California calls from Rome, Italy where he and his wife are vacationing. He tells Phil he is, frankly, dissappointed with how depressed and down-in-the-mouth the Italians are over the Pope. He says there aren't any "big Italian smiles with plates full of food like the brochure tells about." He tells Phils audience he is tired of Catholics "shoving their lifestyle down my throat just like the gays."
Hour Two:
David Hall calls to tell Phil that the phone call from Italy he took during the previous hour just cost the company "thousands." Phil then goes on to talk about the various products the Hendrie family purchases, like slabs of pork ribs from Costco, big packages of Top Ramen, creme soda and root beer and a new screen for the back door from Home Depot. David calls back and screams at Phil for violating FCC decency guidelines by saying the words "slab of pork, big package, creme, root and back door." Bud Dickman then lays an enormous egg with his "Catholic Joke of the Day." Wow. Earl Pants Car Talk is live from Rome where Earl is allowed to look at the famous Pope-Mobile. Unfortunately, Earl finds a copy of Swank stuffed under the back seat.
Hour Three
Phil mentions that it bums him out to see the American flag burned. So Jeff Dowder callls to say the show has gotten real "right wing." The he says he is selling a napkin on E-Bay that looks like the Popes' hat. It doesn't seem to matter to Jeff that he folded it to look like the Popes' hat. Herb Sewell, the child molester turned news commentator, reports on the Michael Jackson case and since there isn't anything going on he gives his opinion about teenage sex and the need for condom dispensers at the local high schools. Rudy Canosa sings the song "Angel is a Centerfold," replacing the "na-na-na" part with "la-la-la." Bob Bakian, flying over St Peters Square, says he sees "Kerry For Pope" signs. Phil, again, tells Bob not to do schtick. Bob tells Phil to go to the hot place. Margaret Grey calls from Rome as well to say she is in line to see the Pope with her son, Jason Jay Delmonico, and she is packing a weapon in case any priests turn on the boy. And then Justin McElroy calls in to say that while it is against the law to threaten the Presidents life, it is not against the law to threaten the loife of a dead President. So he goes on to talk about how he wants to assasinate Woodrow Wilson.
